What I Mean When I Talk About Body Neutrality
If you’re familiar with Sprout Wellness, then you’ve probably seen the term “Body Neutral” before. It’s a practice that I find essential to use with my clients, especially those suffering from negative body image. If you’re new to the term, let’s talk more about it and how it can help you!
Body Neutrality Defined
Simply put, body neutrality means you don’t hate or love your body. This practice is more about acceptance; having respect for your body and the work it does rather than expressing negative or positive emotions toward it.
According to Anne Poirier, a certified intuitive eating counselor and eating disorder specialist, body neutrality is “prioritizing the body’s function and what it can do rather than its appearance.”
Those in bigger bodies, aging bodies, and bodies that don’t fit ideals are often told (in both subtle ways and outright) that their appearance makes them less of a person and less worthy of basic respect and kindness. This mindset is so harmful to people’s physical and mental health, and can often be a factor that keeps them from making beneficial changes.
Having a space to focus on aspects of yourself other than appearance is so helpful and can make all the difference in the way you live your life.
How is this Different from Body Positive?
Body positivity is essentially about having a positive body image. There’s a lot of nuance involved here (a whole other blog’s worth, which I’ll write in the future), but positivity toward all bodies is the most important thing.
One of the struggles I have with body positivity is how much it’s asking for. When you exist in a body that you’ve been conditioned to hate, you can’t just flip a switch and love everything about yourself. You shouldn’t be forced to love your body in order to find peace with it.
Of course, I would love for my clients to love themselves and their bodies, but it would do nothing to ask that from them right from the beginning. I think it’s more important to start small and just try shifting your feelings away from negativity. You can’t look in the mirror one day and decide you love what you see, but you can look in the mirror and realize that it doesn’t matter what you see, because the mirror can’t show you all the things your body does for you.
Again, there’s a lot of nuance and varying definitions, but often the BoPo movement comes down to appearance. Why are we still putting so much value and weight on the way people look?
Enter body neutrality. Focus on the things your body can do and experience, because your appearance has nothing to do with your self worth.
How do you Practice Body Neutrality?
Mindfulness is an important part of body neutrality, so be prepared to practice intentionally. Here are some steps to take that can help make this shift easier for you:
1. Make the conscious decision to stop hating your body
This isn’t something that will happen immediately, but you need to be intentional and conscious in your efforts. You can’t hate yourself into happiness, and it’s time to stop trying.
2. Focus on the good your body does
This exercise can be as simple as you want it to be. Start by thinking about an activity you enjoy doing. Next, think about what your body does to enable you to do these things. Write these things down, and add to the list as you think of more ways your body lets you live your life.
3. Dress comfortably
Fall and winter are the perfect seasons for this practice, because cozy and comfortable are in! Dressing in clothes that are too tight or don’t feel right can ruin your day, and often be on your mind the whole time you wear that uncomfortable outfit. Stop trying to force yourself into clothes that feel bad, and focus on what feels good. Pick colors, textures, and styles you like, and you won’t find yourself preoccupied with your outfit all day. In fact, this comfort may enable you to feel a little more empowered- you can move freely and feel relaxed.
4. Take a look at your social media
Clean up that feed! Social media can be so detrimental to our mental health and body image, but right now it’s up to the individual to change what they experience. Unfollow people who make you feel bad about yourself, period. It doesn’t matter if they preach positivity or any other genuinely good concept, seeing them won’t help you grow.
5. Redirect your negative self-talk
Again, self-hate doesn’t disappear overnight. Even when you decide to stop focusing on the negative, your brain will take some time to catch up. When you find yourself starting to get back on the hate train, redirect. When you think negative thoughts about the way your body looks or is, stop and ask yourself if these thoughts are beneficial. The answer will probably be no, so reframe those thoughts. For example, if you find yourself thinking “I hate the way my arms look,” pause and reframe to something like “my arms let me hug the people I love.” It’s not easy to do, but I can personally say it makes a huge difference.
6. Reestablish your goals and their importance from the neutral perspective
No matter your mindset, your physical health and wellness are important, which means exercise and movement are important. However, it’s essential your goals reflect your perspective. For example, wanting to lose weight because you hate the way you look is not a neutral goal. Go back to thinking about the things your body does for you. Are there activities you enjoy doing that your body struggles with? Make these things the priority in your goal setting. For example, if you love to hike but struggle with inclines and distances, set a specific goal to hike a certain trail after a period of training, and build your routine around that.
Changing your mindset isn’t easy, but it is worth the peace and motivation you’ll find.
So It’s Okay for People to Just be Fat?
Rather than trying to justify why fat people should be allowed to exist happily, I’ll say this instead: the short answer is yes, it’s okay for people to just be fat.
Or rather, it’s none of your damn business. If you are not the fat person in question, it is NOT your responsibility to:
Let someone know they are fat
Give someone weight loss advice
Harass someone about their weight
Encourage someone to lose weight
I could go on, but you get the point.
I know many people have the best intentions when approaching someone else about their weight, and it can be concerning to see someone you love struggle with life as a fat person. Even so, most of the time, it’s best to sit back and be ready to support this person when they decide to improve their health. Sometimes, all your “encouragement” does is make that person feel worse about themself. Instead, work on your own perceptions and biases to help those around you feel more comfortable and accepted.
Want to talk body neutrality, or have any other questions? Let’s chat! Contact me or sign up for a consultation.